DON'T PISS ABOUT - FATHER'S DAY IS ON THE WAY Sunday 21st June 2026 DON'T PISS ABOUT - FATHER'S DAY IS ON THE WAY Sunday 21st June 2026 DON'T PISS ABOUT - FATHER'S DAY IS ON THE WAY Sunday 21st June 2026 DON'T PISS ABOUT - FATHER'S DAY IS ON THE WAY Sunday 21st June 2026

Rude 70th Birthday Card - Celebrating 70 Years Of Being A Massive Cunt

£399

Rude 70th Birthday Card - Celebrating 70 Years Of Being A Massive Cunt

Seventy years. Seven whole decades of being exactly, resolutely, magnificently like this. The 70th birthday card that actually reflects the person — no flowers, no 'wisdom comes with age', just the truth in big yellow letters from someone who's known them long enough to say it.

  • Premium Quality - Printed on luxurious 300gsm gloss card for a high-end feel
  • Perfect Size - A5 format (fits a normal Royal Mail stamp)
  • Blank Inside - Plenty of room to add your own personal message
  • Complete Package - Includes crisp white envelope
  • Bold Statement Design - Eye-catching colours and unapologetically funny message

This rude birthday card is ideal for:

  • The 70-year-old who has been this way longer than most people have been alive
  • Friends and family who know the birthday person well enough to get away with it
  • Rude 70th birthday cards for him or her
  • Anyone whose 70th deserves something with a bit more backbone than a garden centre card

This rude 70th birthday card is the tribute to seventy years well and truly lived.

Card Size A5 (148mm x 210mm)
Card Material 300gsm Gloss Cardstock
Inside Blank inside for a filthy personal message
Envelope White envelope included
Occasion 70th Birthday
Style Funny, Rude, Cheeky Humour
Message Celebrating 70 years of being a massive cunt

 

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UK Standard Delivery

All cards ordered before 9pm are dispatched the following working day. We currently do not offer next day delivery. Find out more information about our Rude Card delivery here.

FAQs

What size are the cards and what are they made from?
It's not always the size that counts, but all of our cards are A5 and are printed on high-quality 300gsm Gloss card.

Can this be sent directly to the recipient?
Yes! You can now add a personal message to the inside of your card. Update the delivery address at checkout too, and we will send your order direct!

Something else?
If you need help while ordering or you've got a question you need to ask, we've got a list of frequently asked questions here.