{"product_id":"rude-birthday-card-too-old-for-midlife-crisis","title":"Rude Birthday Card - At Least You're Far Too Fucking Old For A Midlife Crisis","description":"\u003cdiv data-snf=\"nke7rc\" data-sncf=\"1\" class=\"kb0PBd cvP2Ce ieodic\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"VwiC3b yXK7lf lVm3ye r025kc hJNv6b Hdw6tb\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 12.0pt; font-family: 'Arial',sans-serif; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-ansi-language: EN-GB; mso-fareast-language: EN-GB; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA;\"\u003eRude Birthday Card - At Least You're Far Too Fucking Old For A Midlife Crisis\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003eThe silver lining of getting absolutely ancient? You've well and truly missed the window for a midlife crisis. No impulsive motorbike. No inexplicable tattoo. No leaving your job to 'find yourself.' They're past all that now, and someone needs to celebrate it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePremium Quality\u003c\/strong\u003e - Printed on luxurious 300gsm gloss card for a high-end feel\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePerfect Size\u003c\/strong\u003e - A5 format (fits a normal Royal Mail stamp)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBlank Inside\u003c\/strong\u003e - Plenty of room to add your own personal message\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eComplete Package\u003c\/strong\u003e - Includes crisp white envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eBold Statement Design\u003c\/strong\u003e - Eye-catching colours and unapologetically funny message\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThis rude birthday card is ideal for:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003eAnyone who's definitely past their midlife crisis window\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003eThe friend or family member who needs some honest perspective on their age\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003ePeople who appreciate a card that takes the piss with love\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003eAnyone sending a funny rude birthday card to a man or woman\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003eThis rude birthday card is the reality check they didn't ask for but absolutely deserve.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable width=\"100%\" style=\"width: 100.087%; height: 156.75px;\"\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 33.83%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eCard Size\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 65.9071%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003eA5 (148mm x 210mm)\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 33.83%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eCard Material\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 65.9071%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e300gsm Gloss Cardstock\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 33.83%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eInside\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 65.9071%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eBlank inside for a filthy personal message\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 33.83%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eEnvelope\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 65.9071%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eWhite envelope included\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 33.83%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eOccasion\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 65.9071%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eBirthday for Him for Her\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 33.83%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eStyle\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 65.9071%; height: 19.5938px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eFunny, Rude, Cheeky Humour\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr style=\"height: 39.1875px;\"\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 33.83%; height: 39.1875px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eMessage\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"width: 65.9071%; height: 39.1875px;\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eAt least you're far too fucking old for a midlife crisis. Happy Birthday.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"whitespace-normal break-words\"\u003erude birthday card • funny birthday card for him • funny birthday card for her • sweary birthday card • getting old birthday card • midlife crisis card • rude card for friend • adult humour birthday card • rude birthday card uk • funny birthday card adults • cheeky birthday card • birthday card taking the piss • humorous birthday card • rude cards uk\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Wottahoot Rude Cards","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":56829992927556,"sku":"WHGC16981","price":3.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0785\/2372\/8196\/files\/Rude_Birthday_Card_For_Him.jpg?v=1780948895","url":"https:\/\/wottahoot.co.uk\/products\/rude-birthday-card-too-old-for-midlife-crisis","provider":"Wottahoot","version":"1.0","type":"link"}